LaCroix Executive Blames Declining Sales on ‘Injustice’

Water Bubbles

A recent drop in revenue indicates LaCroix may be going
flat. Blame “injustice,” said the brand’s CEO. 

The National Beverage Corp., which makes the “naturally essenced” sparkling water, reported its first drop in revenue in five years on Thursday evening. In the three months before Jan. 26, its sales were down about 3 percent compared to the year before, while profit dropped 39 percent.

Getting out ahead of the crisis, Chief Executive Nick
Caporella released a bizarre rant unique statement apologizing for the
brand’s poor performance.

“Negligence nor mismanagement nor woeful acts of God were
not the reasons — much of this was the result of injustice!” Caporella said.

In his own words

To explain LaCroix’s performance, Caporella compared the
beverage to…a person who has developed physical handicaps? Yes, he did.

“Managing a brand is not so different from caring for
someone who becomes handicapped,” Caporella said. “Brands
do not see or hear, so they are at the mercy of their owners or care providers
who must preserve the dignity and special character that the brand exemplifies.
It is important that LaCroix’s true character is not devalued intentionally —
in any way.”

Defending the health and vibrancy of a brand by emphasizing its immobility and helplessness is, as Pepper Brooks from Dodgeball might say, “a bold strategy. Let’s see if it pays off for him.”

The result of

The executive then expressed confidence in the product.

“There is no greater passion,” he
said, “than the kind that creates the wonderful refreshment and contentment
described as unique! No doubt, the sound and personality of the word LaCroix,
coupled with the awesome experience of its essence and taste . . . is unique.
One can be induced to purchase by cheapening price or giving away a product,
but falling in love with a feeling of joy is the result of contentment.”

The LaLa feeling

Caporella said he believes LaCroix drinkers will stay loyal, even as more companies vie for their dollars — often with cheaper sparkling water alternatives.

“Just ask any LaCroix
consumer,” Caporella said, concluding his statement. “Would you trade away that
LaLa feeling? ‘No way, they shout – We just love our LaCroix!’ I am positive
they respond this way each and every time.”

There’s not much that can be added to that. Maybe one thing: National Beverage Corp.’s stock dropped nearly 20 percent in premarket trading Friday. Cue sad trombone.

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